


Dirty Laundry

by jamestiqueeriuskirk



Category: Guardians of the Galaxy (Movies), Marvel, Marvel Cinematic Universe, Thor (Movies)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Avengers: Infinity War Part 1 (Movie) Spoilers, Awkward Conversations, Awkward Sexual Situations, Crack, First Kiss, Fix-It, Fluff and Crack, Gen, Intensely Requited Love, Love Confessions, M/M, Non-Consensual Voyeurism, POV Outsider, Public Display of Affection, Revelations, Sibling Incest
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-06-13
Updated: 2018-06-13
Packaged: 2019-05-21 22:31:32
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,065
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14924105
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jamestiqueeriuskirk/pseuds/jamestiqueeriuskirk
Summary: Mantis uses her party trick on Thor. It works out pretty good.-“Again with the human sexual hang-ups,” Drax said, a note of sad exasperation in his voice, like he was beginning to worry it could not be taught. “It’s the most natural, beautiful thing in the world for two shield-brothers to comfort one another the night before a coming battle or sate their lust after a great victory. I’m surprised they never consummated their bond.”“No, Drax,” Gamora said, tone like a patient but underpaid kindergarten teacher. “They’re actually brothers. They’re related.”“Oh,” Drax said, frowning in comprehension, and then he began to make over-exaggerated retching noises, which were, really, just unnecessary, the goddamned drama queen. They all got it; he didn’t need to make this about himself.





	Dirty Laundry

**Author's Note:**

> Peace

“Asgardian royals, huh?” Rocket said, looking them up and down. “Good for nothing but trouble.”

“That’s a fair assessment,” agreed Loki mildly. He was clearly exhausted from floating through space (impressive, actually, that he wasn’t _dead_ from floating through space) but ready to argue their case. He was definitely a sneak. Rocket was gonna have to keep an eye on him, and either kill him or like him. “But might we be permitted to stay, all the same? Our ship has just been blown up.”

“Sounds like they just about belong here,” Gamora said, shaking her head, like the calculations to determine whether taking on another two idiots was worthwhile if one of said idiots was incredibly beautiful were strenuous.

“No,” Quill said through gritted teeth, clearly still sore that Gamora and Drax had fawned over Thor while he slept off the crash on their table, leaving him to tend to the nasty cut on the shining paragon’s slightly tarnished brother’s forehead. “No, they do _not_.”

“We need not stay long,” Thor said. It was meant as a reassurance, but it made Quill bristle on account of it came from Thor. “What would be most helpful, actually, would be a ride to Nidarvellir. Maybe it’s on your way--?”

“I doubt it,” said Quill smugly. “Since that’s _clearly_ not a real place.”

“Peter, don’t embarrass yourself.” Gamora told him, rubbing the bridge of her nose between her index and middle fingers.

“That’s too hard for him,” Rocket said. “Start off with something smaller.”

He surveyed the Asgardians, trying to decide if they were good for the exorbitant fare he was going to name to take them to Nidarvellir. He’d like to see it, but not necessarily out of the goodness of his heart.

“Nidarvellir, then?” he started.

“Yes. Thanos just murdered half our people. I need a weapon before I can face him again.”

“That’s quite a sob story.”

“It’s true,” Loki insisted.

“They _are_ both in tremendous pain!” Mantis said unhappily. “But… I also sense great relief, and love!”

Loki eyed Mantis shrewdly. The expression looked natural on him, though it didn’t necessarily look _good._ “How does she know that?”

“Empath,” Rocket told him, all too aware that Loki filed the tidbit away into whatever assessment he was performing on them all.

“I’ll show you!” Mantis said, reaching for Loki. Poor kid. So good at reading the mood, so bad at knowing what to do with the information.

“I’d rather you not,” Loki snapped, slapping her hand away just as sharply.

Mantis’s lip quivered a little, but she was growing pretty accustomed to being brusquely rebuffed, so she took it in stride and turned to Thor.

“May I?” she asked, already laying her hand on his impressive bicep.

Thor looked uncomfortable but didn’t push her away, possibly afraid he would break her if he tried. It was a reasonable fear.

“Yes, there it is,” Mantis crowed, delighted. “A strong love!”

“Oh, this should be good,” Drax said, straightening in his chair.

Ostensibly, it took her a moment to pinpoint the signal’s trajectory, but it seemed like that might just have been an excuse to get a little bit longer of a grope in. Rocket didn’t really fault her.

“For him!” she said, pointing at Loki.

Loki preened a little and didn’t seem to realize he was doing it. Rocket decided their history must be pretty sad if he needed a third party to assure him his brother loved him and it affected him so.

“Of course,” Thor said. It was strange how he sounded a little guilty. “He’s my brother.”

“No, no, beyond that!” Mantis said. “Romantic love! Sexual love! Oh! _Very_ sexual love! _Unambiguously_ sexual love!”

Loki gaped at Thor. “Brother, is this true?”

“Yes!” Mantis chirped happily.

Loki put a hand on the table to steady himself.

“Ohoho, my God, _dude,_ ” Quill laughed, after a very tense moment of silence, clearly happy he was no longer Mantis’s latest victim, and that her campaign against him had, at least, not been _quite_ that devastating. “She got you _good_!”

Then, after he let that sink in: “Gross. Your _brother_?”

“Again with the human sexual hang-ups,” Drax said, a note of sad exasperation in his voice, like he was beginning to worry it _could not_ be taught. “It’s the most natural, beautiful thing in the world for two shield-brothers to comfort one another the night before a coming battle or sate their lust after a great victory. I’m surprised they never consummated their bond.”

“No, Drax,” Gamora said, tone like a patient but underpaid kindergarten teacher. When the Guardians broke up due to irreconcilable annoyances, she should put that on her resume, because it would better explain what she did with them than “first mate.” “They’re actually brothers. They’re related.”

“Oh,” Drax said, frowning in comprehension, and then he began to make over-exaggerated retching noises, which were, really, just unnecessary, the goddamned drama queen. They all got it; he didn’t need to make this about himself.

Thor looked like he was going to start sobbing, and for a minute, Loki seemed like he was going to attack his brother, which Rocket would have liked to see a lot more than what he ended up doing.

Though it could be said, in a figurative sort of way, that it was a kind of attack.

Mantis moaned.

Everyone – save Thor and Loki, highly engrossed in one another's mouths – turned to gape at her, because that was a little more comfortable than watching the incestuous lovefest happening in the middle of their galley.

“Sorry!” she squeaked. “There are a lot of happy feelings floating around the room right now!”

The feelings were getting a little _too_ happy if you asked Rocket. Rare that anyone ever did, but he figured this was one time no one would begrudge his authority as captain if he used it to make an executive decision about what was allowed on their breakfast table.

“Hey!” he snapped when he saw tongue. “There’s a minor present!”

“I am Groot,” Groot said. He was still playing that damn game; he hadn’t looked up _once_ since their guests arrived, completely unfazed.  

“What do you mean you’ve ‘seen worse?’” Rocket demanded.

“I _am Groot_. I am Groot.”

“ _’Sakaaran step-sibling porn_?’ Quill, how the Hell did he figure out how to get around the damn parental controls on the holonet?”

**Author's Note:**

> [Circecore.tumblr.com](https://circecore.tumblr.com/)


End file.
